Etymology of Masturbation 🤓

Do you feel a bit guilty when you masturbate?

Does it feel kind of dirty to talk (or read) about masturbation?

There are many things that contribute to this, but it may also be the word itself.

According to the Online Etymology Dictionary-

The long-standing speculation is that this Latin word [masturbation] is altered (probably by influence of turbare "to disturb, confuse") from *manstuprare, from manu, ablative of manus "hand" (see manual) + stuprare "defile" (oneself), from stuprum "defilement, dishonor," related to stupere "to be stunned, stupefied" (see stupid). Hence the earliest form of the word in English.

May is Masturbation month, and, for the sake of alliteration, I will continue to refer to it as such but when I refer to masturbation in general, I intentionally say ‘self pleasure’ instead. Yes, I understand that when someone says masturbation they probably don’t immediately think ‘oh yeah, defile myself with my hands until I feel a bit stupid’. But words have power. Because the origin of the word is so saturated in guilt, using it now that I know the etymology feels like perpetuating a sense of shame.

Also, not everyone is using their hand for self pleasure anyway 😏

So this week, make time for your self pleasure in a more intentional way. Think long luxurious shower followed by using your favorite lotion slowly and intentionally. Keep all the lights low, maybe use a sexy playlist (try this one). When you’re ready for the ‘main event’, don’t rush straight into stimulating your genitals. Start slowly and let your hands wander over your clean skin. Feel the texture of your skin with your own fingertips. Try to build up the intensity of your arousal before you start to touch your usual places of stimulation. Notice if your orgasms feel different. Notice if your headspace after self pleasure feels shifted.

That’s your homework for this week. I want you to make intentional time for this pleasure practice. You deserve it!