3 Tips for When Your Libido is Low

Sometimes it happens, we just don't feel in the mood for sex, and that’s totally fine! But if you've been feeling disconnected from your sex drive for a while, it may be time to take action. 

Here are 3 tips that will help you re-ignite your sex drive.

1. Start with the basics.

Before anything else, check on the foundational pillars of your health. How are your eating, movement, and rest habits? Taking care of these self care practices is going to significantly boost your sex drive and overall health. Eating nourishing food, getting sufficient rest, and engaging in physical activities that you love will all contribute to feeling more energized and ready for sexual pleasure. It’s also crucial to support your mental well-being by setting aside time to meditate or engage in other mindfulness practices to help reduce stress and anxiety. You’ll also find that incorporating regular exercise into your routine helps to improve circulation and increase testosterone levels, both of which can have a positive impact on your libido.

For Joe*, an entrepreneur with a new, fast growing business, finding any desire for pleasure or sex just felt out of the question. He was far too busy! After we started our coaching sessions, Joe began to make adjustments to his morning routine and scheduled mini breaks during the day which led him to feel more calm and less rushed. Joe was able to reconnect to simple pleasures which led to a rekindling of his sex drive (which his wife was thrilled about).

2. Try something new!

If it feels like you're never in the mood, it might help to shake things up and try something new to increase your libido. Consider incorporating audio erotica, erotic poetry, a new sex toy, or prop into your routine. You could try a different room in your house or new location entirely. Maybe hotel sex seems more fun? Time for a stay/va-cation!

This worked wonders for my client Jules who was struggling with her sex drive as a new mom. One of the things we worked on together was getting creative with both her solo and partner pleasure practices. Together with her partner, they created a list of things that they had each never tried but wanted to. It lead to both of them being excited for each new rendezvous. This spark created a whole new sense of connection for Jules.

3. Be intentional about feeling sexy.

Being intentional about making time to feel sexy is a great way to increase your sex drive. This can include setting aside time to engage in activities that make you feel sensual, such as taking a relaxing bath, a fresh shave, wearing an outfit you feel sexy in, or practicing self-massage. Whatever makes you feel sexy and desired, make it a priority to incorporate it into your routine. By intentionally focusing on your sexuality, you can help increase your libido and experience more pleasure in and out of the bedroom.

‘Thank you so much for this reminder,’ Emily said in a tearful voicenote after returning from a pole dancing class. Although my client Emily was active, strong, and dedicated to the movement practices she loved, she hadn’t made time for expressing her more sensual side in years. After returning to one pole dancing class, something she simply hadn’t been making time for, her body was lit up with playful, sexual energy.

Whether you are single or in a long term relationship, connecting to your sexual pleasure will give you a deeper sense of confidence, motivation, and fill your body with feel good chemicals (check out my blog about that here).

*all names have been changed to protect client confidentiality.